Writing Like My Heroes

In Bird by Bird, Anne Lamotte describes how writers imitate the authors they most admire, especially after having read them recently. I am soooo susceptible to this. I just finished Bright Lights Big Ass by Jen Lancaster, and I want to add the word asshat to my vocabulary, and develop a much more sarcastic, funny, snarky tone. Years ago when I read Bridget Jones' Diary and was blown away by this novel that actually reflected what my life was like, Iwanted to begin sentences with the word "am" (Am imitating famous writer now. Daily calories, 2700. ) and incorporate the words fuckwit and wanker into my vocabulary. I read at least one Jodi Picoult novel every year, and always close her books convinced that it's time to write a novel about a pressing issue of our time with a legal twist, and illustrate how it tears families apart and affects those we love. I read Annie Dillard and despair that I can never be successful unless I learn to describe, in excrutiating detail, every living thing within a ten-mile radius of my home. Tom Robbins makes me want to write stories with inanimate objects as characters.

So how do I reconcile this? Well, I recognize that Jen Lancaster doesn't write like Jodi Picoult, who doesn't write a thing like Anne Lamott, who doesn't write like Brenda Ueland, even though they're all brilliant in their own right. I think it's a pretty common struggle for writers. It's called finding your voice. It's a matter of confidence, really: the confidence to choose your own words and know that they're the right ones to get your point across, and the confidence that your way of doing it is valuable somehow.

I still really want to make better use of words like asshat and wanker, because they're such great words. But my husband says I shouldn't curse- not because it's offensive to him or to anyone else in our circle of friends, but because it just doesn't sound right when I do it.

Are there other writers out there? To quote a favorite line from one of my favorite movies, who are your influences? (Bonus points if you can name the movie)

Thoughts on appearances

I just read this waiting mother's thoughts on external beauty and while I would never do something so extreme as what her mother did to her, I do feel sometimes we focus too much on our children's beauty. I think my two daughters are the most beautiful children on the planet, but I sometimes cringe when people dwell on this. I cringe even more when they speak in generalities about how beautiful Ethiopian people are, or even worse generalities about all people of color. More than once a well-meaning acquaintance has squealed "Oh, I just love little ethnic babies!" It's an absurd comment, really, because we are all ethnic. We all came from somewhere. But I cringe because the sentiment has a patronizing quality to it.

One of the things I write about in my memoir is that I never want to be one of those kinds of people... the kinds who turn their personal lives into some big issue and lecture people all the time about what words are OK to use. But I have realized that there are a handful of issues that get on my nerves, and I hope this will be a place where I can voice them without coming across as strident or overly sensitive. Everyone I've encountered has been so positive about our adoption of our daughters. But I think I'm going to need to rant just a little bit about some of those things. And the post above really rang true for me and made me think of one of those issues.

Curious to hear what others say about commenting on the beauty of Ethiopian children, or children of other ethnicities. Has it happened to you or to your kids? How do you respond?

Most depressing day of the year?

I heard on the radio today that a researcher has determined that today is the most depressing day of the year. Why? Christmas bills are arriving, there are very few, if any, days off of work coming up, it's almost time to work on taxes, and at least here in Minnesota we're experiencing the coldest week of the year and we're still not seeing much sunlight in a given day.
I think this guy has hit on something. Lewis Black has a great bit about taking extreme measures just to see a little color at this time of year. Everyone I know aruond here finds this a difficult time of year. Not only is it cold, but we've had wintery weather since Halloween. A snowy December is kind of charming. Now it's getting old.
But ultimately I find this news heartening for the same reason I kind of like December 21, the shortest day of the year. In December, every day from then on gets a little longer, and we get a little bit more sunlight. Every day after today, the supposed most depressing day of the year, should get a little better. The cold will come to an end and we'll start to see some sun. The bills will get paid eventually. The sun will come out tomorrow, Annie...

Writer's Strike

I don't know if others feel this way, but the writer's strike has been great for me. I'm not a fan of reality TV, so the 6-8 hours per week that used to be dedicated to my list of personal must-see shows are suddenly free. In short, I'm getting a ton of writing done. I am seriously considering culling those 6-8 hours once my shows are back on.
With two small kids and a full-time job, my time for writing is after 8 p.m. on weeknights, and maybe for an hour while they nap on weekends if I'm feeling really motivated.
If you had to give up a portion of your TV watching routine, what would be the first to go? What would you cling to no matter what?
A couple of years ago I finally stopped watching ER. I never started with Private Practice, thankfully, but I can't seem to let Grey's go.